I’ll Love You The Most

By this time your back with her

I’m here with the lights on dim

Really its just a sin

That your missin’ out on me while you gutta with the leech

She’s just sucking you dry

She ain’t worth your time

Stop dealing with a lame when you got me by your side

Well I wanna be by your side

I’ll leave him if you stay by mine

All these days without words leave me with desires

For you and only you

And now I know its true

That I can love someone else after years with a heart turned blue

 

Why have this love affair

Why leave with questions to bear

If we want each other, let’s be fair

You know were just a better pair

I don’t want us living with regrets

So baby don’t fret

Because i’ll bet

You and me are just a better set

 

I’ve been numb, cold as frost, thinking i just lost

… You, but she’s not the one you choose

Is it? Nah I’m better than who you’ve had

As confident as the day I first met you, my bad

I’m not cocky but just speaking #truefacts

It’s just too bad

Distance ain’t nothing but a measurement

But it still leaves me mad

But nobody handles this shit better than us

‘Cause I swear you’re right next to me when we text, just us

It leaves me wanting more like fuck

But I can barely handle this shit like fuck

Can’t I have you without the fuss?

 

Why have this love affair

Why leave with questions to bear

If we want each other, let’s be fair

You know were just a better pair

I don’t want us living with regrets

So baby don’t fret

Because i’ll bet

You and me are just a better set

 

‘Cause all he got on you are just memories

Some cherished, but most are all just ancient history

The next is a title with me, but you can take that so easily

He’s extinct to me

Your riding the bull, you have the reigns on me

He couldn’t handle, but I know you can baby

And you know our sex life would be epic-intensity

Got me with this warm crazy feelin’

Life is feeling so pure with you, pura vida<3

I’m looking at a better future with you, no coldplay reflectin’

Just you and me, viva la vida

 

Why have this love affair

Why leave with questions to bear

If we want each other, let;s be fair

You know were just a better pair

I don’t want us living with regrets

So baby don’t fret

Because i’ll bet

You and me are just a better set

‘Cause with her your settling for less

You know I’m up for the love quest

And you know I’ll be the one who loves you the best

 

Inhale

Sometimes I feel
You’re so near
So near I hold
My breathe till it feels
Like my body can’t bear
I feel chills
I feel tingly
En yet I feel numb
To the reality
But have to breath
let go of all that I want
I don’t want the pain
But I have to breath
I exhale and feel
My heart bulging free
Free and I sense
The aching all over again

Smirk (not done)

Say you’ll be there
But I don’t even care
I say I care
but I don’t care
I do this so you can feel important
Even if I want you at a far distance
I know it’s apallin’
& know it’s gunna be confusin’
when I want this relationship to end
So then..

I smile at you as I start to say I can’t
I can’t do this anymore
And I’m sorry I’m smiling while I say this
But I suck at explaining shit like this
I smile out of nervousness
I care for you but compared to love? much less
I’m nervous, I don’t wanna hurt the man who’s love I can’t reach
And that’s all you seek
But I’m sorry, my heart stays out of reach

and now you can’t believe what I’m saying, Expected reaction
unexpected that you say you’ll fight for my emotions
Too bad I have no emotions
for you there’s no affection
And I know you saw some before
But you couldn’t see my eyes open
While our lips locked, kissin’
My anxiety whenever you touched me,
the more days past the more I was flinchin’
My body reacting to love uneeded
I know your heart feels beated
But I want this relationship to end
So then..

I smile at you as I start to say I can’t
I can’t do this anymore
And I’m sorry I’m smiling while I say this
But I suck at explaining shit like this
I smile out of nervousness
I care for you but compared to love? much less
I’m nervous, I don’t wanna hurt the man who’s love I can’t reach
And that’s all you seek
But I’m sorry my heart stays out of reach

–this poem sucks, I’m half asleep and with a fever. It needs major adjustments or just a whole new start. I just needed something new to put up.

DADT

— when I was influences by Lady Gaga, wrote this poem to Repeal DADT last year (:

In the air we all spare
all the time in our lives
can’t think right just stay high
Above all others, we don’t bother
But the others feel we bother
We just trying to create new beginnings for gods sake
Deciding to be one of the greats, can make you feel all the hate
We just try to facilitate the little love we make
It’s our battle, we can handle
They say stay quiet…shhh
But these topics are to diar
Time to speak, don’t be weak
We’re not free but we still in the jeep
In the streets, defending for you creeps
The least u can do Is acknowledge my orientation
It’s stated in the declaration. Your lucky we been patient.
Don’t ask don’t tell
Keep your life to yourself
They all say this to ignore all the prejudice
Time to face this, my life isn’t basic
Deal with the discriminants
Stop sending home the real fighters, fighting for all freedoms, their promises ARE kept
Repeal D.A.D.T
Changes need to be M.A.D.E

The Monsters Behind Me

And with a bit of luck,
I can shed light from the shadows,
keep calm without paranoia,
Move forward with positive thinking..

For If I look back,
I will see my own monsters clawing at me,
I will have betrayed my luck.

I must not look back.
I must not look back.
I must not look back.

The New

I loved so fast
So much I thought it couldn’t last
Even with the pain, he slipped right past
Came out of no where
Gave me presents, no Teddy bears
Nothing you could buy, just emotions, it’s so wierd
Make my hairs stand up,
He had no plans, just his trust
No lines at his punch
Kept me high, while my past was cut
In the air,
we both stared
To Each-other, it was bare
Naked, no lies, all is fair
Showing each layer
Our cuts and tears
Showing off our physicality’s
Better yet, our personalities
Straight forward, no conformities
Really it’s the best I’ve ever seen me
No more weeping, I’m past glee
Your smiles are stuck on my teeth
Don’t stop, Cuz I’m on the pursuit
My happiness is you
I’m only speaking truth
My foots lifted, get the glass shoe
Cus it’s only me and you,
You know what to do
This is just a relief,
knowing you were made for me
No second thoughts, no dealing with the creeps
Cuz we were meant to be.