I had her since I was 6 years old. I just turned 21 in May and she passed in March. She was months away from her 15th birthday. I’ve had her for 15 years of my life. That’s about 72% of my life. But really, I can’t even remember my life as a baby. So really, I’ve had her for as long as I can remember. 100% of the time she was and will always remain a part of my family. She was my sister. From the time we picked her up from Miami to the day she left us in my sisters’ arms, she loved us, over loved us, unconditionally. It’s indescribable the amount of love she showed me because I can’t even understand it. No matter how many times I might have been mad or sad and she instantly forgave my feelings and replaced it with love, trust, and loyalty. That no matter what, I would love her through and through and I was her protector against anything that could harm her. I was her voice. Her eyes only spoke to me that she loved me and trusted her life in my hands. To feed her, hold her, hug her and coddle her as my response. To show her, I accept your trust and I will honor to love you back because there is nothing more precious than unconditional love with loyalty and total trust in something. It’s the most innocent and pure thing to have. To know that this being instantly believes in you so much that you must own up to this responsibility. You cannot let it down. And although we as humans always make mistakes, they forgive us without any doubts. Its amazing to think about because we could never be that naive. We hold grudges and stay bitter. Thats why we love them so much. This bond is so pure and unlike any other bond we can have with a human. A love like no other. I’m realizing now why it hurts so much. Dogs only spend about 15% of years in their owners life. You would think that with there innocent and never evil minded hearts, they should live well past humans, who lose their innocence very fast and knowingly throughout their life. It’s not fair. My Nala deserved a healthy long life. Her love span should have made her live for decades. But life isn’t like that. The greatest things and joys brought to us humans must always come to an end. We do not deserve that love for an eternity. But the fact that they must suffer for our sins is so cruel to me. I’m so sorry Nala. You deserved better. I cannot wait to meet you on the other end. I love you so much, please know you are missed dearly, I know you are waiting for us up there baby.
I’ve came to the conclusion
I no longer need these illusions
Time no longer matters, it’s a state of confusion
What I do here and now is my state
Your opinion no longer matters, at this rate
What I do is my matter, i don’t need your “for god’s sake”
Do this or that, it’s a wrap
Came to talk? Bro don’t attack
I know what my life has become
I don’t need mirrors surrounding me
I see within myself everyday
And bro it’s scary
I need change, but change is scary
Day by day I get weary
Do I really wanna fight the battle within me?
Break the walls of defeat
Build my ego, inches and feet
Stack ’em up ’til I’m ready to go.. Go.
But where’s my confidence at?
Bro push me to succeed and confidence shall lead.
one good deed ends to another
My life ends here and out comes another
resurrected, built 10 times harder
And I’m here to stay, no falling out
I come to find my path, no following out
Through the forests I’ll find my own way out
So just let me be
I got this, you see?
Just let me.